A Step-by-Step Guide to Self Love Affirmations

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Why are self love affirmations and why are they important?

We need to take our thoughts captive and replace those negative thoughts with the truth. We need to audibly speak positive affirmations over ourselves.

My breakthrough all started when I was sitting at my kitchen table in the middle of the day. I was between jobs, single, broke, and unsure of where life was taking me next. A few months after my mindset transformation, I was overcome with a sudden sense of hopelessness sitting at the table.

It was almost as if a dark gray cloud was hovering over me and my thoughts turned extremely negative. Instead of being able to affirm myself, I was believing every lie that was coming at me. It was to the point where I was starting to have suicidal thoughts. I was so overwhelmed by every lie that was racing through my mind.

All of the sudden, I heard God tell me to stand up and stand in front of my full-length mirror. He told me to start at the top of my head and go down to my feet and only speak true things about myself. I wasn’t allowed to say anything negative.

I stood there for at least 30 minutes, with tears streaming down my face, trying to only say positive things about myself. It was one of the hardest things I had ever done, but also one of the most life-changing things. 

I spoke words out loud that I had never said before. Things such as, “I am beautiful, I am pretty, I am nice curves, I like myself, I am good looking, I have good skin, I have nice hair, I have a purpose, I have a reason to live, I am worth loving.” I stood there repeating those words and so many more until some of those words slowly started to stick.

Affirm Yourself

God was teaching me how to take my negative thoughts captive and affirm myself with the truth. He was teaching me how my tongue has power and that I needed to affirm myself out loud. Since that moment I have continued to use this weapon whenever those negative thoughts try to make their way in.

It was challenging at first, but as time went on it got easier and easier. I would find whatever mirror was closest to me, oftentimes the rearview mirror in my car, to speak the truth out loud.

“Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.”  Ephesians 4:29

The reason I share this story is that speaking out loud was such a powerful tool for me to learn on my journey of self-love and I wanted to share this tool with others. We all face negative thinking and a lot of times we have carried those words with us since we were young children.

The problem is that often are not taught how to counteract those words so they become our truth. We are often not taught how to stop looking for outside validation and how to affirm ourselves. 

What Are Affirmations?

Affirmations are sentences or phrases asserting something that is positive and true. It’s an expression of agreement to a thought or belief. 

Philippians 4:8 (AMP) says, “Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart]”.

What Are the Benefits of Affirmations?

When used consistently, affirmations can help you change a negative thinking pattern to a positive thinking pattern. The Word of God tells us to renew our mind daily (Romans 12:2), and that is what affirmations help us to do.

They help us to change the dialogue that is in our mind. They change our “I can’ts” to “I CANs!” Using self-love affirmations can be very motivating because they help you to start believing in yourself and your abilities.

Using affirmations consistently can start moving that positive thinking from conscious behavior into your subconscious. This is where our inner peace comes from. This is the place where we can truly love ourselves because our minds are filled with truth.

How Do I Use Affirmations?

The key to using affirmations is to be consistent with them. That means being intentional about creating a routine for speaking your affirmations. 

One of the best ways to start your day is to speak affirmations right when you wake up. Give your thanks to God, then affirm yourself. Do this before you do anything else, including picking up your phone.

Speak your self love affirmations over yourself several times a day. This will help you really get those words into your subconscious. I recommend affirming yourself in front of a mirror when it’s available because it allows you to get in your own face. 

How to Write Affirmations

There are a few steps to write affirmations in a way that makes them most effective. Grab your favorite notebook and the writing utensil of your choice.

Step 1: Use an “I” message

Make sure the affirmation starts with “I…”. Some examples are “I am”, “I have”, “I do”, “I can”, “I love”. You are speaking them to yourself, so make sure you are the subject of your phrases. 

Step 2: Use the Present Tense

Speak as though you already have it, this will help your mind visualize and believe it. For example, “I have replaced my monthly income with my annual income.” 

Step 3: Use “Do” instead of “Do not”

Your affirmations should be positive phrases, and never negatives. Your mind won’t recognize the negative phrasing as something that you don’t want. For example, “I choose healthy foods naturally” instead of “I don’t eat junk food.”

Step 4: Keep it Short

It’s easier to remember your phrases when they are short and to the point. You don’t need to add in extra fluff or write a paragraph. When you are having a moment where you need to speak your affirmations quickly, this isn’t the time to be remembering all of the words in a long phrase. 

Step 5: Be Specific

When you are specific about what you want, it’s easier for your mind to visualize it. Include describing words or specific amounts of what you are believing for.

Step 6: BE KIND TO YOURSELF

You are fearfully and wonderfully made in the image and likeness of God. Regardless of where you are at in life, where you think you should be, and what the world says about you, you are a truly amazing person!

Forgive yourself for the negative words you have spoken to yourself and move forward. We have all said and done things that we may regret, but now you have a choice to be kind to yourself. Love yourself where you are, even if it’s not yet where you want to be.

Affirm Yourself for self love

What I want you to do is to take time right now and find a mirror and stand in front of it. Now speak one positive thing to yourself. Keep speaking that one thing to yourself until you start believing it.

Do it until it becomes ingrained in you. Then, choose another positive thing to speak over yourself. Continue affirming yourself every single day, adding more positive words each time.

Wherever you are at, whenever you are standing in front of a mirror, speak those positive words to yourself out loud. Once you have made self love affirmations a practice in your daily life, try to add some other ways to love yourself.

ANY QUESTIONS?